barefoot

 

For most of last month, the Lord had me in the gospel of John. Specifically, He had me focusing on chapter 13. Little did I know in the moment, that He was using this chapter to prepare my heart for the next season I am heading into. Let me explain. 

John 13 is the chapter where Jesus washes the disciples feet. 

Jesus knew that His time on earth was coming to an end and He wanted to leave his disciples with a memory, a demonstration, a reminder and a charge. 

One night close to the time of the Passover, Jesus was eating din with his homies, the disciples. It was a casual time of eating until Jesus got up and did something unexpected. In the middle of the meal, Jesus got up from the table, grabbed a towel and a bowl and began to wash his disciples feet. 

When Jesus got to Peter, Peter was outraged and refused. He couldn’t bare to watch his King wash the dirtiest parts of him; the parts that journeyed through the mud, the grime, the crap (literally), and the dust. Jesus responded to Peters objection by saying, “Unless I wash you, you have no part with me.” 

The Lord had me in this first part of the chapter for a few days. He wanted me to sit with Him and come to the understanding that JESUS, the King of the world and the creator of the universe, wanted to wash MY FEET. He wants to cleanse and renew even the darkest, dirtiest parts within my soul. And if I refuse Him access to those places, I am refusing myself access to all He has to offer;  the cleansing, the healing, the freedom, and the love. I must first surrender my feet to be washed by my Savior. It was a beautiful moment  when Jesus asked me to physically dip my feet in the river and let Him wash my feet; a moment of surrender and feeling the love He was freely offering. 

After I got to a place of allowing my Savior to wash my feet, He asked me to keep reading chapter 13. 

When Jesus was finished washing the disciples feet He said, “Do you understand what I have done for you? You call me Teacher and Lord and rightly so, for that is what I am. Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet.”

I believe Jesus washed the disciples feet in order to encourage a surrender that lead to a deeper level of intimacy with with His friends. He also gives the disciples this beautiful picture of what a servant leader looks like. Here is their Lord and their Teacher, kneeling down, humbling Himself, and washing their feet. That is what true leadership looks like. Jesus was painting a picture for the disciples to remember long after Jesus left them. The leadership Jesus walked in was one of humility and service and He was asking His disciples to lead like that. 

So after reading this I was challenged. I was challenged to take a look at the way I lead and served my team. I began looking back over the last four months of being Fiercely Loved’s team leader. There were moments where I humbled myself and served them like Jesus did but there were also moments I chose myself over serving them. God was asking me to step into servant leadership. He was asking me to take the lowest position and wash my team’s feet. 

For a moment, there was a level of confusion. God, why are you reminding me of this with only a few weeks left on this team? Why are you bringing me to this passage now? I knew that God was reminding me to be present with my team for the time we had left and to serve them with everything I had. But I also knew He was getting me ready to leave team Fiercely Loved. He was preparing me for something new and was reminding me to serve like He did in whatever I moved to next. 

What I didn’t know was that only 2 weeks later, I would be asked a big question. “We would like to ask you to be a squad leader. Will you pray about it?” SHOOT. Lord, what??? Yes, it was a 3 question mark kinda question. 

Okay hold. For those of you (which is probably all of you) who don’t know what a squad leader is— let me explain. Our squad is made up of 24 racers and 2 alumni squad leaders. The alumni squad leaders (Hannah and Jenny) went through the race already and for the first 5 months of our race, they are on the field with us to lead and guide us. They jump from team to team each month, serve with that team, and pour into the squad in so many different ways. Both of these incredible women have beautifully impacted my life. Since they are only here for the first 5 months, when they leave, two people from the squad take their place on the field as ‘raised up’ squad leaders. 

After hanging up the phone with Fran, our squad mentor back in the States, I was at a loss for words. God, you want me to lead my squad? I am not ready for that. But He brought me back to John 13. 

That evening, it was our teams last night together on the boat before leaving Bolivia. We had decided to use our last night to do communion and to have a time of washing each others feet. As we were worshipping and washing feet, Hannah (one of our squad leaders who spent the month with us) came over to me and washed my feet. As I looked at her washing my feet, I was brought to tears because I knew so clearly what God was saying. He told me that He wanted to me to say yes to squad leading. He wanted to to step into this new and exciting thing. And if I wanted to know what that looked like, I needed to look down at Han washing my feet. Both Hannah and Jenny have done nothing but serve their hearts out for the last 4 months. Squad leading isn’t about the position or the title. It is simply a way to wash my squads feet. It is a way to lead like Jesus did; by serving in the most humble way. 

So I said yes. I said yes to serving humbly like my Jesus did and I said yes to squad leading. The next morning I pulled Han aside and told her that I was saying yes to stepping into squad leading. She smiled and said, “Welcome to team barefoot!” I had no clue that was our leaderships team name. They chose barefoot as their team name as a picture of running wild and free to the Father’s arms. I hear barefoot and I will always be reminded of John 13; allowing my savior to wash my bare feet, and turning and washing my neighbors in response. 

Team barefoot is made up of some incredible humans; the alumni squad leaders (Hannah and Jenny), the coaches (Doug and Kris), the squad mentor (Fran), and my fellow raised up squad leader (Sara). Here we are at our squad debrief last week. I will share more about them in the near future but for now just know that they are amazing and I cannot wait to lead with them! You can also check out Sara, Hannah and Jenny’s blogs on the left hand side of the browser. 

Now, Sara and I are spending the month training. The first two weeks we are with Hannah, Jenny, and Fran and they are training us on the ins and outs of squad leading. Then for the last half of Argentina, Sara and I will be splitting up and going to a team and stepping into squad leading with one of the alumni squad leaders there to help us. 

This is a fun and exciting change I am stepping into. I can’t wait to see all that God does through my next form of ministry. This means that my race will look a lot differently than I expected it to be when I started this journey. Isn’t it funny how the Lord has different plans for us than we think? Both change and unknowns are really hard for me, and right now I’m in the middle of both. Please keep me in prayer as I navigate the changes with the Lord and press into all He has. 

Here’s to new seasons, saying yes, and serving like Jesus did!